Descending the steps of the Capitol Building on Tuesday, Attorney General Jeff Sessions stopped abruptly in his tracks; he simply could not remember why he had visited his friends at the Senate Intelligence Committee that evening. “I know I walked in, we chatted for a while, and then we went ...

Media analysts were baffled on Tuesday afternoon when scripts provided by CNN stenographer Dana Schumacher diverged from statements made by Attorney General Jeff Sessions in his much-anticipated appearance before the Senate Intelligence Committee. As Sessions answered questions from committee members on Russian electoral interference, a transcript broadcast live on CNN ...

Arriving in style to his primetime debut, Alex Jones entered the Sunday Night with Megyn Kelly studio dressed in a dapper tin foil double-lapel and slacks. “I bought this for inauguration day,” Jones declared proudly, noting that he couldn’t attend due to cellphones at the venue. The Reynolds Wrap suit ...

Surprising many, First Year Chancellor Harry Pollack announced this past Friday that “Manifesto of the Communist Party” by Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels will be the subject for the annual freshmen summer book program. “Our goal for the freshmen summer book program is to expose students to new and potentially ...

After four months of avoiding eye contact on campus and at least biweekly “you up” texts, sophomore Rachel Levin and junior Richard Weissman have reached a comfort level in their relationship that may finally allow for cordial conversation during daylight hours. The duo, who met through a mutual friend during ...

Google announced this afternoon that it would buy France, the popular European country, for stock that it valued at $1.65 Trillion. Google beat out a number of other France suitors, including the United Kingdom, Germany, and Elon Musk. By once again successfully negotiating the deal, Google has once again proved ...

Calling it an “act of compassion,” Vice Chancellor Holden Thorp commemorated freshman Taylor Wong for her service trip to a traditional dorm at a school-wide ceremony this past Friday. “Taylor’s courageousness and bravery to visit a place that is in such need of help ought to inspire all of us,” ...

August 14th 2016: Eco-To-Go box arrives to Wash U after being made in a Chinese Factory. August 29th 2016: Freshman Henry Newberg receives Eco-To-Go box from Bear’s Den after receiving a free voucher from his RA. August 30th 2016: Freshman Henry Newberg vomits in the Eco-To-Go box after a rough ...

It’s been a rough month for President Trump. With his refugee ban blocked by federal judges and Obamacare intact after a disastrous episode in Congress, Trump has few successes and many broken campaign promises under his belt. However, Trump’s L-train seems to be in reverse after President Trump crushed his ...

Reports confirmed that local apartment 7222 Forsyth Blvd. 3W is growing uneasy that the snot-nosed punks who toured it last week might actually sign the lease and rent it. With no new tours since then, 3W has been left to contemplate what it calls “a worst case scenario.” “I can’t ...