WashU’s Depression Olympics

As the weather begins to dip into a chilly Midwestern 45, seasonal depression is starting to consume WashU’s exhausted student body. In the long lines of Cherry Tree, students can be seen sipping watered down coffee murk in between “eye rests.” One student can be seen on the brink of ...

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Top 10 Artists For WILD

1. Samuel L. Jackson reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar 2.Whoever the fuck “Surfaces” is 3. All 3 Spider-Men 4. Live feeding of SU funds to an alligator 5. Only the dead Beatles 6. Ken Bone 7. The Aristocats 8. WUPD Mental Health Attack Squad 9. Chancellor Martin’s Spotify Wrapped 10. ...

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In Defense of Wingdings

👍□■⬧♓♎♏❒ ⧫♒♏ ■□♌●♏ ♒♓♏❒□♑●⮹🞐♒📬 ❄♒♏ 🔾♓♑♒⧫⮹ ♋■♍♓♏■⧫ ☜♑⮹🞐⧫♓♋■⬧ ♓■❖♏■⧫♏♎ ♋■♎ 🔾♋⬧⧫♏❒♏♎ ◆⬧♏ □♐ ⧫♒♏ ♌♏♋◆⧫♓♐◆● ♋❒⧫ ♐□❒🔾 ♐□❒ ⧫♒♏ ⬧♋🙵♏ □♐ ♍□🔾🔾◆■♓♍♋⧫♓□■📪 ♋■♎ ♓⧫ ♓⬧ ♍□■⬧♓♎♏❒♏♎ ⧫□ ♌♏ □■♏ □♐ ⧫♒♏♓❒ ♑❒♏♋⧫♏⬧⧫ ♓■❖♏■⧫♓□■⬧📪 ♋●□■♑ ⬥♓⧫♒ ⧫♒♏ 🞐⮹❒♋🔾♓♎⬧ ♋■♎ 🔾◆🔾🔾♓♏⬧ ♋■♎ ⬧⧫◆♐♐📬 ✌●♋⬧📪 ♓■ ⧫♒♓⬧ 🔾□♎♏❒■ ⬥□❒●♎ ⬥♏ ♍♋●● ♒□🔾♏📪 ⧫♒♏ ...

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