👍□■⬧♓♎♏❒ ⧫♒♏ ■□♌●♏ ♒♓♏❒□♑●⮹🞐♒📬 ❄♒♏ 🔾♓♑♒⧫⮹ ♋■♍♓♏■⧫ ☜♑⮹🞐⧫♓♋■⬧ ♓■❖♏■⧫♏♎ ♋■♎ 🔾♋⬧⧫♏❒♏♎ ◆⬧♏ □♐ ⧫♒♏ ♌♏♋◆⧫♓♐◆● ♋❒⧫ ♐□❒🔾 ♐□❒ ⧫♒♏ ⬧♋🙵♏ □♐ ♍□🔾🔾◆■♓♍♋⧫♓□■📪 ♋■♎ ♓⧫ ♓⬧ ♍□■⬧♓♎♏❒♏♎ ⧫□ ♌♏ □■♏ □♐ ⧫♒♏♓❒ ♑❒♏♋⧫♏⬧⧫ ♓■❖♏■⧫♓□■⬧📪 ♋●□■♑ ⬥♓⧫♒ ⧫♒♏ 🞐⮹❒♋🔾♓♎⬧ ♋■♎ 🔾◆🔾🔾♓♏⬧ ♋■♎ ⬧⧫◆♐♐📬 ✌●♋⬧📪 ♓■ ⧫♒♓⬧ 🔾□♎♏❒■ ⬥□❒●♎ ⬥♏ ♍♋●● ♒□🔾♏📪 ⧫♒♏ ...

Great white Okay white Left shark The one from Shark Tales my dad thinks is gay Me when the kids at the local pool ask me to be the shark in their sharks and minnows game The one that raced Michael Phelps (and won!) Mark Cuban The one whose teeth ...

According to the CDC, nearly 4 million babies are born every year in the U.S. That’s nearly three times the size of the U.S. military. However, this high birth rate means little to nothing considering how weak, dumb, and wrinkly the vast majority of babies are. But what if we ...

This past weekend, a group of concerned citizens gathered around the Koenig lawn to obstruct the training session of the Belegarth Medieval Combat Society, or what the protestors refer to as ‘LARPers”. I asked around to get a better understanding of their diverse grievances. “Every Saturday I look out from ...

Freshman Jared Small was seen fleeing campus late Thursday evening with the Mudd Field COVID-testing tent tucked under his arm. A video of the contraband appeared on Small’s TikTok video app account later the same day with the caption “just hit the most diabolical lick 👅🤩😈🎪.” All 14 of Small’s ...

The First Year Center has just released its yearly report on the first years’ transition into the WashU community and has found that the class of 2025 is deeply confused by how often circumcision is discussed on campus. Unable to tour before applying last year, the new cohort of bears ...

A startling realization, as it has come to me through neither divine inspiration nor careful research, is the cyclical nature of many contemporary conversations, various articles, and even debates. These resources, while well intentioned and well-written, add little substance to the discourse at play. Favoring a winding, complex sentence structure ...

Our administrative sources are reporting that the class of 2026’s summer reading program will be Vatsyayana’s Kama Sutra. An ostensibly controversial choice, the decision aligns with WashU’s commitment to teach people things they will never get the opportunity to use. Many students expressed eagerness to learn more about sensuality, tragically ...

PSA: This article is not meant to take away from the ever-present issue of male circumcision, it serves only to bring light to the similar issue of coffee mug slogans excluding men. Feminism has gone too far, and nowhere is this trend more obvious than in the hallowed American institution ...

Virgo: Look out! Love is in the air. Better catch it, lest you live life loveless and alone. If you can’t catch it, duck.   Libra: Watch out for sharks. And cars. And the unstoppable drumbeat of each passing second. Better yet, just stay at home today.   Scorpio: Goat day! Memorize ...