There seems to be a crisis nowadays—a pandemic, if you will—in which the individual’s responsibility to society is called into question. Whether or not you take certain actions has suddenly become indicative of a person’s character, despite the fact that these actions are in truth quite ridiculous. I am here ...

Hey, freshman! Yeah bro, you right there. Way you’re walking, looks like the only thing you’ve been crushing this semester is tap water. I get it I get it, things are dry these days: no Big Daddy’s, no TKE basement, no Chem PLTL. Most of the girls in your life ...

WASHINGTON D.C. — At an unplanned press conference on Friday, CDC Director Robert Redfield informed Americans that right now the most constructive thing to do in response to the Coronavirus is panic, absolutely panic. Sweating and panting uncontrollably, the visibly frightened CDC Director told Americans to just “freak the fuck ...

ST. LOUIS—In a recent address to the Class of 2020, Chancellor Martin somberly announced that Washington University has made the difficult decision to postpone commencement until the afterlife. “It is with a heavy heart that I share with you that due to the COVID-19 pandemic, a graduation ceremony will not ...

The following op-ed was submitted by a guest writer who has chosen to remain anonymous. He has asked WUnderground staff to list him under the pen name “‘Mandrew Artin’, or some shit like that.” Guys, you might not believe this, but Chancellor Andrew Martin? Surprisingly jacked. Yeah. I saw him ...

That’s it, liberals. I’ve simply had enough. You’ve crossed the line. I am indignant. You’ve always been pushing it with your politics….everyday I’ve had to hear this and that about you and your “progressivism,” but I just won’t stand for it anymore. I am simply furious. I am writing this, ...

It’s about that time of year again: trophy season—and I’m not talk- ing about hot wives! This year more than ever, there have been complaints about how the Oscar noms for best picture seem heavily tilted towards movies that solely feature male narratives. Well, as a Male Feminist, I’m here ...

When I was selected by the WUnderground editorial board to rush and subsequently write a review of new fraternity Delta Chi, I was worried about the task for two reasons. First, I was worried I wouldn’t be dope enough for them—I think beer tastes bad and have never even attempted ...

Sources report that upon completing her final town hall in Iowa, Senator and presidential unreasonably hopeful Elizabeth Warren was seen putting her ‘FUCK IOWA’ bumper sticker back on her car. “Jesus Christ, if I had to spend one more motherfucking minute in a dismal middle school auditorium with those fucking ...