Issue 9.2

Top 10 Crime Prevention Tips

10. Most people fall into a life of crime because they had a poor education. Ask suspicious persons what Atticus Finch represents about the American spirit. 9. Never leave your room. 8. Try to avoid displays of wealth, like wearing ashy jewelry and attend- ing a school that costs more ...

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Freshman’s Sex Life Not Living Up to Expectations

Freshman entertains himself with a condom he knows he won’t use that night anyway.

Six weeks into his college career, Freshman Matt Blake’s sex life has failed to live up to his expectations. Despite the popular media’s depiction of college as a time for wild parties and unrestrained sexual deviance, Blake says that his experience has been overwhelmingly disappointing. “Where are the tits?” a ...

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