24
Dec

Ask WUnderground: Advice Column

Dear WUnderground, Any advice on finding a boyfriend for this Christmas season? Sarah   Hi, Sarah, We at WUnderground know how difficult it can be for holiday-loving lonely hearts. It seems like the only Christmas lovers are Tinder users Zach, 19, promising to “put the toe in mistletoe” and Mac, 23, saying “tits…
Read More
A Sprinkle of Hate this Holiday Season
24
Dec

A Sprinkle of Hate this Holiday Season

Sexually aroused, confused, comforted, disturbed, deaf in one ear…alone. I felt all these things and more post-attending my first college a capella concert. Sitting in the pews of a place where a funeral had occurred a week ago, I assured myself nothing could be worse than that.   I wish I had been…
Read More
A Holiday Mystery as White as Our Alumni
24
Dec

A Holiday Mystery as White as Our Alumni

Winter is abrewing. That means the skies are stormy, the frats have new pledge classes, and WashU has countless broiling lawsuits when the WashU bear cubs of tiger-mama’s slip on the way to Management 100. All of this is to say, mysterious white powders are showing up all over WashU campus. We sent…
Read More
SeAsOnS GreEtInGs from the WashU Republicans
24
Dec

SeAsOnS GreEtInGs from the WashU Republicans

Location: North Pole Feeling: A bit peeved off  Well, it’s official. Santa has gone woke. That’s right, he’s Jewish now. Just kidding. But it’s almost just as bad. Old Saint Nicholas must have asked his little serfs for a surfboard this year (we’re still busting nuts for his union busting) because he’s riding…
Read More
My Christmas List For Santa
24
Dec

My Christmas List For Santa

My Christmas List for Santa   Dear Santa,    I got an extensive list this year because I was super cool and nice to my little brother Brady who fucking stinks and smells like Lemonheads all the time. I even went and visited him at Tufts and met his girlfriend Mariah Carey. She…
Read More