Issue 14.7

Call for WUnderground Summer Interns!

Attention to all Wash U students still seeking summer internships! WUnderground, Wash U’s premier [only] satirical newspaper is in DESPERATE need of detail-negligent summer interns. Responsibilities will include writing coffee and fetching articles. This internship will be paid in the most valuable currency of all: experience (writing dick jokes). Below ...

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Benevolent God Takes Away Our Pool Ladder Again

Oh feebee lay litzergam. Pehpeh lou sul sul, gouhh… verna dehna! Ah, crushnah! Eckeh tahlwah moorlih aom yomwurbwleh. Como stadah kah blah na dah ahduwesteh deepwa spanewash deepla blah. Dis wompf es fredesche. Harva sol labaga along with hava so lawnumgm, hurdy furdy sarl-de-baggy. Yesh, ah fweegah fwaa. Boobasnot cuh-teek-a-loo ...

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Area Man Displeased About Release of Personal Information

Particularly when dealing with sensitive subject matter, WUnderground is committed to preserving the anonymity of the students we interview. We therefore find it necessary to publicly apologize to sophomore Jason Tang, who told us he felt that Holmes Lounge was overrated under the condition that we do not print his name. Tang, who is double majoring in Physics ...

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