Volume 19

28

Apr

What Your Most Frequented Dining Hall Says About You

Whispers Simply put, you thrift. You would rather stick a plastic Whispers fork in your eye than wear jeans that are not from Avalon. But for some reason you also are wearing those 300 dollar apple Beats by Dre around your neck like you’re from Shake it Up. Also you are in EST…

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28

Apr

Jonah Hill Wasn’t the Reason I Started Liking Jewish People, the Parkside Bagel Was. This Is My Story.

Jonah Hill wasn’t the reason I started liking jewish people, the parkside bagel was. This is my story.  My biggest issue with Kanye West’s only instagram post is that he claims Jonah Hill’s performance in 21 Jump Street is the reason he decided not to hate Jewish people anymore. I’ve seen that movie,…

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09

Apr

ChatLGBTQ: The Future of Online Love

Looking for love? Sick of Hinge offending you with its compatibility suggestions? Are you queer? Have no fear! This new AI robot has you covered. From the creators of ChatGPT, ChatL- GBTQ promises to revolutionize your dating life with a simple algorithm. Using ChatLGBTQ is easy: simply ask the bot a dating- related…

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09

Apr

OP-ED: If Planes Went Higher In The Sky The Distances Between Places Would Be Shorter

So like you know how when you’re on Google Maps and you wanna look at a place that’s really far away from the place you are. But since it automatically opens to the place you are, like basically street view, you start to zoom out? Like you’re not gonna scroll to the place…

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09

Apr

Students4Stalking Demands Change

The recent news of WebSTAC losing WUSTL Faces has hit the campus community with a particular difficulty. Students are struggling with a wide range of issues on the matter. Student A, who prefers to remain anony- mous, shared that this is her only manner for stalking men she sees at Sumers: “Not only…

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