334 Posts
A Farewell Letter

A Farewell Letter

Dear Reader, As all of WashU knows, at the end of this semester, we must all say goodbye to one of the most important figures on campus. Although he is often embroiled in controversy, the student body cannot help but feel a collective endearment towards him. As he prepares to retire from his…
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THE MUELLER REPORT LEAKED! Here’s What We Know

THE MUELLER REPORT LEAKED! Here’s What We Know

The Mueller Report was finished up on Friday, March 22nd, and so far, the Justice Department has done a surprisingly good job of keeping its contents under wraps. Attorney General and stock photo of a white businessman William Barr has sent a short summary of the report to Congress, informing them that the…
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WashU Announces Innovative Plan to Increase Economic Diversity

WashU Announces Innovative Plan to Increase Economic Diversity

No one can deny WashU’s strengths as an academic institution. Boasting some of the best faculty in the world and vibrant extracurriculars the university is frequently ranked among the most elite in the nation. There is, however, one category in which WashU has nearly always ranked very close to last: socioeconomic diversity. A…
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St. Louis Style Modifications

St. Louis Style Modifications

Surprised by St. Louis style bagels? Here are some other 'St. LOuis style' modifications you haven't heard of: 1. St. Louis style beach vacation No coastline? No problem! The banks of the Mississippi offer the same waterfront fun without any of the hassle of sand, nice weather, non toxic water, or happiness. 2.…
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New Study Finds Kids with Fairy God Parents Still Total Fucking Losers

New Study Finds Kids with Fairy God Parents Still Total Fucking Losers

Researchers at Johns Hopkins published results of a two-year study on Monday concluding that kids with fairy god parents are still “complete fucking dweebs.” The study, which highlights data collected from state-wide surveys, announced “the arbitrary reception of magical companions does not counteract defects in chill factor.” Those involved in the report considered…
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