Issue 16.6

21

Feb

Andrew Martin Surprisingly Jacked

The following op-ed was submitted by a guest writer who has chosen to remain anonymous. He has asked WUnderground staff to list him under the pen name “‘Mandrew Artin’, or some shit like that.” Guys, you might not believe this, but Chancellor Andrew Martin? Surprisingly jacked. Yeah. I saw him at the gym…

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21

Feb

Op-ed: That’s It, Liberals

That’s it, liberals. I’ve simply had enough. You’ve crossed the line. I am indignant. You’ve always been pushing it with your politics....everyday I’ve had to hear this and that about you and your “progressivism,” but I just won’t stand for it anymore. I am simply furious. I am writing this, because I can…

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21

Feb

Op-ed by a Male Feminist: Actually, These Five Oscar-Nominated Movies ARE About Women

It’s about that time of year again: trophy season—and I’m not talk- ing about hot wives! This year more than ever, there have been complaints about how the Oscar noms for best picture seem heavily tilted towards movies that solely feature male narratives. Well, as a Male Feminist, I’m here to explain loudly…

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21

Feb

We Sent an Intern to Rush Delta Chi. Here’s What Happened

When I was selected by the WUnderground editorial board to rush and subsequently write a review of new fraternity Delta Chi, I was worried about the task for two reasons. First, I was worried I wouldn’t be dope enough for them—I think beer tastes bad and have never even attempted to surf. Second,…

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21

Feb

Relieved Elizabeth Warren Finally Able to Put ‘Fuck Iowa’ Bumper Sticker Back on Car

Sources report that upon completing her final town hall in Iowa, Senator and presidential unreasonably hopeful Elizabeth Warren was seen putting her ‘FUCK IOWA’ bumper sticker back on her car. “Jesus Christ, if I had to spend one more motherfucking minute in a dismal middle school auditorium with those fucking cornsucking assholes,” said…

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