By Snobby Professor Guy Pfaw.  Bees.  Bees? Bees?   An abomination upon this planet.  I cannot wait until they are all dead. Allow me to elaborate.  I am smart. Classy. Intelligent.  So when I say that bees are to be abhorred and exterminated, you should make privy your ears and listen closely.   For…

By Geoff Caulfield I am a male feminist. Think it’s funny? Go ahead, laugh. But while you’re laughing, just know that I am brave and I am strong. Strong enough to use two women as weights and bench press them. I am a male feminist and this is what I stand for: “I…

For the purposes of this example, I have bracketed a distinction between positive and negative action because I’m not some sort of Kantian dipshit. You are the conductor of the Loop Trolley, and it’s happened again. A man has stumbled onto the tracks ahead of you, thrusting you into an overdone ethical dilemma,…

8 AM. Wednesday. A crowd of freshmen stand in the Rutledge common room, staring at the expo residue on their whiteboard where the Community Living Standards had once been. Scared. Confused. Perhaps, I sense, almost excited? Would we be able to live together in peace and harmony without law, but with love? 9…