Descending the steps of the Capitol Building on Tuesday, Attorney General Jeff Sessions stopped abruptly in his tracks; he simply could not remember why he had visited his friends at the Senate Intelligence Committee that evening. “I know I walked in, we chatted for a while, and then we went ...
Read More »CNN Stenographer Goes Rogue During Sessions Hearing
Media analysts were baffled on Tuesday afternoon when scripts provided by CNN stenographer Dana Schumacher diverged from statements made by Attorney General Jeff Sessions in his much-anticipated appearance before the Senate Intelligence Committee. As Sessions answered questions from committee members on Russian electoral interference, a transcript broadcast live on CNN ...
Read More »Alex Jones Wears Formal Tin Foil to Interview with Megyn Kelly
Arriving in style to his primetime debut, Alex Jones entered the Sunday Night with Megyn Kelly studio dressed in a dapper tin foil double-lapel and slacks. “I bought this for inauguration day,” Jones declared proudly, noting that he couldn’t attend due to cellphones at the venue. The Reynolds Wrap suit ...
Read More »First Year Center Selects Communist Manifesto For Summer Book Program
Surprising many, First Year Chancellor Harry Pollack announced this past Friday that “Manifesto of the Communist Party” by Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels will be the subject for the annual freshmen summer book program. “Our goal for the freshmen summer book program is to expose students to new and potentially ...
Read More »Couple Hooking Up for Three Months Takes Relationship to Next Level, Get Coffee
After four months of avoiding eye contact on campus and at least biweekly “you up” texts, sophomore Rachel Levin and junior Richard Weissman have reached a comfort level in their relationship that may finally allow for cordial conversation during daylight hours. The duo, who met through a mutual friend during ...
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