17.4

BREAKING: WashU Uses YOUR COVID Spit to Create Genetically Modified Clones
29
Apr

BREAKING: WashU Uses YOUR COVID Spit to Create Genetically Modified Clones

An investigation conducted by WashU’s Premier journalists has exposed where your gross food-particle-y spit goes post COVID test (we know you don’t actually abstain from unholy indulgences/extravagances like food and water for 30 minutes before the test, you ignorant fools). We never actually see where the vials of spit go post 0.5 mL…
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Harvard Medical School Application Question #4
29
Apr

Harvard Medical School Application Question #4

Supplement Question #4: How has an undergraduate volunteer, extracurricular, or research experience better prepared you for medical school?   During the Covid-19 crisis, I wondered, like many other people, what I could do to help bring an end to this pandemic. While some of my peers signed up for the Moderna’s human trials,…
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Looking for a Fast Track to Salvation? Look No Further
29
Apr

Looking for a Fast Track to Salvation? Look No Further

Indulgences remit sins. Right? WRONG. Ever wondered why you spend hours doing “good works” every day but it doesn’t seem to get you anywhere? That’s because it never has, and I know that’s hard to believe, but it’s true. If you’ve been trying to get into heaven, you know just how confusing it…
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