Articles

Issue 14.2

God Suspended Due to Hazing Incident
Senior “Not Like Those Other Guys”
One Year After the Election: Where Are They Now?
Staff Review: Strange Thingers Returns to Netflix
Six Foolproof Tricks for Mind-Blowing Sex
Astros Win Important Baseball Game

Issue 14.1

Trump Briefly Forgets Vice President’s Name
Squirrel Planning Something
WUnderground Publishes Confusing Meta-Article
Recent Study Shows That Nobody Cares About Your Fucking Himalayan Salt Lamp, Laura
Five Steps to the Perfect Mid-Autumn Tan
Members of Mystery Inc. Charged with Trespassing, Aggravated Assault
Internet Usage on South 40 Breaks Record During Fall Break
Boy Scouts Expanding Into New, Weirdly Niche Groups

Bonus Articles: Summer 2017

White House Expels Steve Bannon by Chanting Name Three Times
Anti-Bullying Groups Fear Unprecedented Spike in Wedgies, “Sick Burns” as Thousands Don Glasses to View Eclipse
Scaramucci Confident Wife is Actually Reince Preibus
White House Intern Looks Suspiciously Like Robert Mueller
Jeff Sessions Cannot Recall Visit to Senate Intelligence Committee Hearing
CNN Stenographer Goes Rogue During Sessions Hearing
Alex Jones Wears Formal Tin Foil to Interview with Megyn Kelly

Volume 13 2016-2017

Issue 13.8

First Year Center Selects Communist Manifesto for Summer Book Program
Couple Hooking Up for Three Months Takes Relationship to Next Level, Get Coffee
Google to Acquire France for $1.65 Trillion
Freshman Recognized After Taking Service Trip to Traditional Dorm
History of the Eco To-Go Box

Issue 13.7

After a Month of Crushing Defeats, Trump Gathers Cabinet to Beat Them at “Trump The Game”
Forsyth Apartment Increasingly Nervous Assholes Might Actually Rent It
Roommate Also Excited to Stop Living With You
WUnderground Reviews Dave Chappelle Netflix Special
StudLife Controversy Over Pastaria Review

Issue 13.6

WILD Decision Looking Rocky but SPB to announce A.S.A.P.
Jerry Sandusky Named Top Athletic Director Candidate
Sophomore Accepts Internship at Organ Research Institute
A Guide to GETTING BUFF Without Actually Fucking Working Out
 Is Your Roommate Rich?

Issue 13.5

Sniper Planning on “Taking Out” Girlfriend for Valentine’s Day
10 Signs Your Girlfriend is Cheating on You
The WUnderground Award-Season Rundown
Student Taxidermy Club Forced to Shutter After Discovery of “Josh From K4” Exhibit
Freshman Girl Discovers 150 “Long-lost Sisters”; Confronts Parents
SHS Prepping for Housing Casualties

Issue 13.4

Issue 13.3

Post-Election Clinton Addresses Local Credit Union
Shy Woman, Consistently Holding a Mug, Claims She’s an “Avid Writer”
Sophomore Unaware Thanksgiving to Double as Intervention
Things Chancellor Wrighton Invented Other Than Glow-Sticks
WGSS Professor Fails Student’s Essay: “Not Enough Jargon”

Issue 13.2

Junior Wakes up Face-First in a Ditch, Still Pretty Confident he Remembers Fall WILD
United States Admits Half of Existing Conspiracies True; Conspiracy Theorists Vindicated
Campus Embroiled in Controversy After Sorority Girl Fails to Instagram Darty
A Guide to Networking
Is Your Dog Dead?
Apologize to Don Cheadle.
Wrighton Email MadLibs: Election Edition

Issue 13.1

EST Warns Supply of Kissies May Not be Enough to Combat South 40 Boo-Boo Outbreak
Citing Lack of Diversity, Physics Department Grants Tenure to Freshman Who Withdrew from Class
Freshman Haunted by Demon Stupidly More Worried about Making Friends
Unfazed by Debate Rejection, Johnson Forges Ahead in Campaign
Open Discussion for Democracy and Disagreement Ends in Fatal Stabbing
WUSA Drops Out of School to Pursue Culinary Ambitions

Volume 12 2015-2016

Issue 12.8

Tour Guide Almost Manages to Assure Prospective Student’s Mother Campus is Perfectly Safe Without Laughing
Social Justice Warrior Searching For More Reasons to Boycott Class
Grandparents Already Saving Seats for Graduation
RA Agrees to Let Resident Keep Prefrosh as Pet
Cum Trees Preventing Campus from Being Safe Space
Fraternity Accused of Sexism, Racism, and Homophobia; Vehemently Denies the Homophobia

Issue 12.7

Student Life to Pretend It’s Only a Joke Once a Year
WUPR Exec to Block Lame Duck President’s Actions
WUnderground’s Guide to Easter
This Weekend’s Social Calendar
Student’s Orgo Homework Stolen in Armed CarjackingWashU PR Encourages Attractive Minority Students To Do Homework Together
Last Kid at Karate Still Waiting for Stepdad

Issue 12.6

A Letter from the Editors Regarding Our Block Funding Campaign
Ursas Fireside Poker night cancelled for 2016 presidential debates
WUnderground’s Logarithmic Aggression Scale
New Philanthropy Event “Relay for Your Life” Raises Concerns
Nation’s Annoying Dads Can’t Wait for Borat Jokes to Be Cool Again
Reviews of Reviews of Kanye West’s The Life of Pablo

Issue 12.5

Markets Tumble as Gak Prices Plummet to 13-Year Low
All Sorority Girl Jury “Not Judging” Arsonist, Just Think He’s a Good Fit for Prison
SHS Doctor’s Medical Degree found to be false positive
Most Popular Baby Name of 2015 Officially “Who Did This 😂🙌💯”
69, What the Fuck is This Shit?
No-Fun TSA Officer Won’t Drink Smirnoff Ice Hidden in Passenger’s Anus
Professor Considers Dropping Class
Ask WUnderground: Should I Hook Up with my Friend’s Ex?

Issue 12.4

An Open Letter to Chancellor Wrighton
WUnderground Reviews 12.4
Mallinckrodt Pharmaceuticals Assures Citizens that Radiation Will Give Everyone Superpowers
Religious Scholars Debate Controversial New Text
Dr. Ben Carson: “As a fetus, I would not just sit there during an abortion”
WUnderground Through the Ages

Issue 12.3

Wrighton Addresses Concerns with Salary Reform for Adjunct Professors
Last Freshman Finally Disenchanted with WashU
SubMarines: New Delmar Cafe Hires Only Vets With Extreme PTSD
Office of Sustainability Launches Seasonal Initiative: #NoWipeNovember
Student Life Investigates Leaves Falling from Trees: Fraternities at Fault
Conversation with Grandma Just Won’t End
Wrighton & Wrong-Un 12.3
Writing 1 Professor Hopes Students Don’t Realize She’s Tripping On PCP In Class Today
“Safest WILD Ever” sees 30% drop in students attacked by crocodiles

Issue 12.2

WUnderground’s Guide to Greek Life
Tensions Flare at the Office
Student who pays $60,000 for tuition excited by free lunch
Connie to add Glass to all Campus Sweets
Admissions Announces New Strides Towards Intellectual Diversity on Campus
B-School Students Learn To Speak, Write In “Communications” Classes

Issue 12.1

Sophomore Transfer Hopes Academic Environment Provides Distraction from Sex
Unpaid Intern Excited to Show off Office Perks
Joe Biden Considering Going On A Run
President Obama Can’t Wait to Jerk off
Live-Action Role Play Club President Promises It’s Not a Weird Sex Thing
WUnderground Reviews the Fantastic Four

…older issues coming soon. Find PDFs back to Volume 8 here.